Mon, 31 October 2016
We've done it! Final Fantasy XI is over, and we have three small scenarios to talk about. Special thank you to Mog's Mixtape for the remix!
SHantotto starts beign up to no good and trys to open up a new dimension as an experiment, but she makes a mistake in her calculations and a giant explosion goes off.
Enter Domina Shantotto. She's like the evil half of shantotto, who brings along Tarutaru clones to take over Vanadiel.
Forming a new Shantotto empire, Nooborious is sent on a quest to power up 6 protocrystals accross the land. After the quest he's sent to assassinate Aldo. After a fight with Aldo, Nooborious explains the situation and Aldo gets to work.
They find out Shantotto is being held in Ro'Mave, and when they reach her find her to be an unusually kind Shantotto. Appearently in the accident Shantotto was split in two. One being the nice shantotto and the other being Domina.
Much like Agent Smith, Domina Shantotto's next move is to make everyone in Vanadiel her clone. Even after Nooborious defeats her, she lets out the curse. What happens then makes little sense, but the real Shantotto comes back after going to an alternate Vanadiel, and the two become huge Kaiju Shantottos and have an epic fight, which results in the real Shantotto lifting the curse.
A Moogle Kupo D'etat
The adventurer's moogle (the one in Nooborious's Moogle house) runs into some moogle mafia troubles when he's informed that he's been kicked out of the Mog House Management Union. Following an investigation, Mog gets trapped in a rent-a-room in Jueno, and Nooborious has to get ingredients together to give to Shantotto in order to free him.
Dom Kupeliaure, the Moogle "Union" boss, informs Moogle that he has to pay a large fee. Desperate, Mog asks Nooborious to find his "secret savings". But even that turns out not to be enough money, due to some bullshit interrest.
It gets even worse when they kidnap his girlfreind for ransom (which makes Moogle loose his property to goblins), and when a cat burgler, Nanaa Mihgo, is sent to "teach him a lesson", Nooborious has to swoop in to protect him.
Moogle at last is once again decieved when he is invited to Castle Zvahl to be taken care of. It turns out another Moogle named Riko is in on a scheme with Dom to bulldose the moogle properties to make way for luxury apartments. Nooborious fights his way through the entanglement, defeating Riko and his henchmen, and knocking an evil gem from Dom's belly that was appearently making him do bad things.
Moogle goes home, and all is well.
A Crystaline Prophecy
When a giant Crystal randomly appears in the sky over Vanadiel everyone begins to hear the song of legend. When is subsequently dissapears though, only Aldo, Verena, and Nooborious have any rememberence of the event at all.
Suddenly a young boy named aldo (yes, the same name as the other aldo) freezes time and informs Nooborious that the crystal has chosen him for something, and Nooborious then sets off to gather a bunch of shit to the crystal at Quifim island.
It turns out that the Crystal is really there to destroy the world with its song and is growing more and more powerful. The real Aldo, Big Aldo finds out that there's a counter-verse that can be sung (still don't know if figurative or litteral), that can make the crystal lose its power.
Fucking with the will of the crystal pissess off some orthodox Mandragoras, and you have to fight them off.
So it turns out that Young Aldo is the son of Big Aldo's sister, Emiline (the girl in the openning video), and Aldo is hell-bent on saving her from the ill-will of the Crystal.
Nooborious and Big Aldo go on a quest to find her, and the siblings are momentarily reunited, but all is not as it seems. Soon Emiline dissapears due to the seed crystal, and Young Aldo informs them that he and his mother were both dreams by Emiline so powerful they that appeared to be real....... Anyway, Nooborious and Aldo have to go up Delfucks tower, gather the necessary Seed Crystal peices, and then stop the Seed Crystal once and for all.
In the end it turns out that despite the visions of people he witnessed, the real Emiline is alive and will somwhere in Vanadiel, going by the name Mathilde. And that's good enough for him.
Google Play: http://bit.ly/2dOvyG0
Direct download: UFF_128_CrystalineProfessybyShantottoofakupodeita_mixdown.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 12:00am MST
Fri, 28 October 2016
Join us for another sexual episode of Final Fantasy Unlimited. Will the chocobo horde stomp the life out of our friends? Will the Magun thaw? Find out!
Mon, 24 October 2016
This time, we review the newest of the Final Fantasy XV films; Kingsglaive Final Fantasy XV.
Kingsglaive: Final Fantasy XV
Kingsglaive: Final Fantasy XV is a 2016 computer animated fantasy anime film directed by Takeshi Nozue, written by Takashi Hasegawa, and produced by good ole Hajime Tabata. The film was developed by Visual Works, Square Enix’s CGI studio. The film is obviously connected to the Fabula Nova Crystallis subseries, and is meant to get everyone ready for Final Fantasy XV. Kingsglaive was created as part of the multimedia rollout of Final Fantasy XV. The film began production in 2014 by the same team that brought us Advent Children. Kingsglaive uses discarded stuff from the original story, while creating a separate experience and plot. Square Enix brought in multiple external studios into complete the project in time.
The story takes place on the world of Eos. This planet is divided into multiple nations that each once held magical crystals. Sound familiar?! The kingdom of Lucis is currently the only nation that still has a crystal. They use it to defend themselves via a gigantic magic barrier. The crystal holds special powers, ie magic, and is only accessible through the Ring of the Lucii, which is passed down from monarch to monarch. Recently, the militaristic empire of Niflheim has been conquering nearby nations, and is currently at war with Lucis. Lucis is protected by the Kingsglaive, an elite unit that uses the royal family’s magic powers. Kingsglaive starts out with King Regis accepting terms of peace from Niflheam. Regis must cede the territories around the crown city Insomnia to Niflheim, and marry prince Noctis to Lunafreya, the former princess of Tenebrae. Another place that we have no context of… lol.
Mon, 17 October 2016
This week, Joe teaches us about Genji. Who was this man, and what is his significance in the series? We also discuss the recently announced Stormblood expansion to Final Fantasy XIV. We discuss our thoughts on the trailer, and discuss what a Red mage would do in the game. We also discuss a little about our upcoming games, and announce that we have stopped the Shantottification. Enjoy the Grind!
Mon, 10 October 2016
We've done it! We finished Rhapsodies of Vana'diel, and will be putting FF XI behind us..... Or will we?!?!?!!? Find out soon!
Rhapsodies of Vana’diel
Rhapsodies of Vana’diel is the final expansion/add on for Final Fantasy XI. It was released in thirds: part one in May 2015, part two in August 2015, and part three in November of 2015. The game was designed by producer Akihko Matsui, and the extremely memorable final themesong was composed by longtime FFXI mixmaster Naoshi Mizuta. Rhapsodies was meant to be a sending off for Final Fantasy XI, as well as a big thank you to players for their years of service within the game.
Rhapsodies begins with our heroine, Iroha, visiting the great crystal and voicing her need to visit Reisenjima to warn her master… We then meet up with captain Gilgamesh, who claims that he found a woman on a rowboat who cried out Elhusk. Since, at this point, Elhusk was in a relationship with Lion, he had no choice but to investigate. This is where we formally meet Iroha, who claims to be our future scullion or something, and wants to stop the Emptiness from consuming Vana’diel. Iroha dissolves, and the Reisen Shrine orb we’re holding brings us to the mothercrystals Holla, Dem, and Mea.
A vortex appears, and a monster with it, in Quifim Island. We impale the beast, and enter the vortex. And then we see him. The masked man…. Dun Dun DUNNN!!! We enter an alternate Zi’Tah where the Emptiness totally won, and swallowed life. Lions spirit takes form, and she adds herself to the Reisen Shrine orb. Once the shadow lord is defeated in the original storyline, we are able to go through Reisenjima’s gates.
About a year later, when we finally jumped back into the game, we meet up with the man in the mask, who has Siren fight Elhusk. Elhusk, being the stout warrior that he is, defeats siren while barely taking damage. Siren is released from the masked man’s thrall, and let’s us know that Iroha will reappear again. Then we have a bit of a world tour, getting Tenzen and Prishe to add their powers to the Reisen Shrine Orb. We then move to visit another past girlfriend, Nashmeria, who informs us of the masked man using power from the future to open these portals. The masked man breaks into the Walahra temple, and tries to siphon the Astral Candescence’s power, but is stopped. We head to the Alzadaal Undersea Ruins.
Phoenix reaches out to Alexander, requesting some of his power to help sustain Iroha’s existence. He obliges, and we then head to meet up with Cait Sith, who confirms that the future we saw earlier where the emptiness had consumed everything wasn’t a forbidden one, thus Atomos cannot consume it. Cait Sith then suggests we get in touch with Altana to protect Iroha.
We then meet up with yet another past sweetheart, Lilisette. She heard that Elhusk had become a god, so she adds her light to the Reisen Shrine orb, and vows to find a way to contact Altana. The masked man stole away Atomos’ power, and took off. We then meet up with Iroha, who is a complete BEAST now, by the way. Iroha claims that Siren and herself are abominations to the world. We of course reassure her that she’s the bomb, but she never listens. We then train, and head to Ugilappeh to speak to Grav’iton Berrisaci, who informs us that we must pass through a mothercrystal to cross into the realm of the gods. We then meet up with Selh’teus and some baddies, who are trapped in the crystal.
Siren shows up again, and helps Iroha, and Siren Prime, try to banish all who do not belong. Tenzen stops the show, since he doesn’t want Iroha to leave. She’s pretty mad about this, but whatever. We meet up with Dr Shantotto, who gives us Koru-Moru’s magic doll to point us in the right direction. We head to Escha - Ru’An and encounter our old friend Balamor, who has stolen Selh’teus’s crystal energy, and wants to create a world of his own. He goes super sayan, and we whoop his ass. Selh’teus then reveals his plan to become the new mothercrystal. Then the big reveal: The dark man is Elhusks future dark side, created to fight the darkness, but failed. Elhusk defeats bizarro Elhusk, and sends him off Boromir style.
We then get a sweet vision showing all of those we’ve beaten down. Then we head to the Reisenjima Sanctorum. Reisenjima is revealed to be the site of our last stand, and an ethereal shield is erected to save it from the void. In deciding to gather light, Elhusk creates bizarro Elhusk, who gathers darkness. We then head to Adoulin, seeking Arciela’s advice. Balamor has been travelling many different worlds, but many were swallowed by emptiness. He is pretty stoked on the Reisen Shrine orb, though, and gives us some of himself just to see things unfold. We head to the Hall of the Gods, where it’s revealed that darkness will descend when the five mothercrystals shatter, and rejoining them will bring Paradise, yet end Vana’diel.
Selh’teus then offers Elhusk the power of the crystal in order to become a god. We then fight an ascended form of Promathia, a dragon named Sempurne. Elhusk crushes this scrub, and meets up with bizarrro Elhusk. The time to fight is now. The darkness sends out a ton of those Sin Scale things at the beginning of X, and all of our favorite characters wreck their faces and drive the darkness back for now. Then comes the most frustrating quest in the game…. Panopt hunting…
We are tasked with killing 11 of these fuckers, and being the stalwart hero he is, Elhusk also decided to take on the king of the panopts in a gruelling, twenty minute fight. With the panopts dead, order has been restored to the lifestream, allowing Selh’teus to regain his powers. We then meet up with Altana, who asks Bizarro Elhusk and Elhusk to fight to the death. Bizarro Elhusk is revealed to be Metus, but it’s no matter. Elhusk triumphs. Everyone is super stoked, but then the Cloud of Darkness begins corrupting the mothercrystal. We can’t really destroy the thing though, and the Phoenix Blade leads us to a stone circle in La Theine, where the Gods enter the material plane. We then pack our Reisen Shrine orb with the powers of Alexander, Odin, Ifrit, Shiva, Ramuh, Titan, Garuda, Leviathan, Atomos, Cait Sith, Diabolos, Fenrir, and Bahamut. We head for the Sanctorium for the final fight. All of our previous expansions heroines trust forms are auto summoned fight tooth and nail to stymie the advance of the Claws of Darkness. We then get a fucking ballin cutscene where Iroha is given all the power of the Shrine Orb, and Phoenix is restored to full power. This causes the Cloud of Darkness to manifest in physical form, and now we commence the final fight. Which was a BITCH! Special shoutout to Abbu for helping us out. Elhusk’s body couldn’t survive the clas, and must find respite in the mothercrystal. The only way his light will shine in this world again will be through a chorus of life, crying out through time and space; The Rhapsodies of Vana’diel. Iroha donates her hair to us, which is good since I’m totally losing mine, and disappears once again. Then the final song picks up, and we hear the Rhapsody to rival Queen’s.
The expansion is so very much a thank you to fans, that Mizuta came up with the idea of asking players to contribute to the final song. Indeed, the voices that ring out during the final cutscene of the game are none other than adventurers from Vana’diel! How fucking cool is that?! Square Enix had a page dedicated to fan submissions of “la la la’s”. There is a zip file of the music, a vocal sample, and the music sheet. They requested that users submit the file along with their character name, so they could get the recognition. It was available to active players and unsubscribed ones alike. Unfortunately, the voices of Nooborious and Elhusk are not among those singing the rhapsody.
The Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pVZgBk7_jTM
Mon, 3 October 2016
This week, we review the second to last expansion to Final Fantasy XI:Seekers of Adoulin. Enjoy!
Released March 27th in 2013, Seekers of Adoulin was the last full expansion for FFXI.
It featured many new areas in FFXI, all surrounding the Nation of Adoulin and the outlying Ulbuka Territory, and added jobs the jobs Geomancer and Rune Fencer.
Gameplay-wise Adoulin added a lot of things such as Colonization, Coalition Assignments, Reives, Skirmish and Delve.
The music was written entirely by Naoshi Mizuta, who created 9 new tracks for the expansion.
The nation of Adoulin, which has been locked off for a long time, opens it doors to adventurers in order to settle the Ulbukan hinterland. On the way to the new nation, Nooborious meets a young woman named Arciela (our new expansion heroine). She tells Noobrious to register as a pioneer with the Pioneers’ Coalition, and the expansion begins.
Talk about the Impermatures and Adoulin Reives.
It turns out Arcelia the sister of the Grand Chancellor of Adoulin and a descendant of the former royal line, which means nothing yet.
The Pioneers' Coalition tells Nooborious to uncover the secrets of the leafkin (a race of leafy beings), and meets with Teodor, a mysterious man clad in black who says that the sword carried by Arciela is the key to meeting the leader of the leafkin (known as the Otharsyne, the sword had been passed down the royal line and represents the will of the Founder King). Teodor explains that after King August (the founder guy) subjugated Ulbuka years ago, he made a promise to never tread upon the land. The Otharsyne it turns out, could allow the king to defy the pact he had made.
In an attempt to borrow the sword, for, you know, stuff…. the Adventurer finds Arciela and she decides to go looking for the leafkin in the Yorcia Weald where they had been seen before. There, they meet Rosulatia (the mega-leafkin) who explains that danger is coming to Ulbuka.
It turns out that the world tree “Yggdrasil” had existed in ancient times on the continent of Rhazowa and that a second tree had been planted by King August in Ulbuka. However, when the Orcish Empire fucked up the world tree in Rhazowa, its connection with the tree in Ulbuka was spoiled.
When Arciela asks how they can help, Rosulatia replies that they should ask the king, and gifts a pome to the Adventurer.
After this, we get some scenes of civil war between the factions that oppose adoulin expansion, and those who are for it. Luckily the group that is about to kill Arcelia is stopped just in time (the fight in the waterways).
During a council meeting, it’s explained by Arcelia that Councelor Ygnas had turned into a leafkin who can no longer communicate with humans (Cid in FF9). However, a pome that the Adventurer receives from Rosulatia allows Ygnas to speak directly into the Adventurer's mind… For reasons, I guess.
So they try to cure Ygnas with an Exorsist named Ingrid, but that doesn’t work. Soon Ygnas’s voice fades from Nooborious’s head, but not before Ygnas warns him of terrible things coming to the land.
Suddenly a girl named Nyline comes wandering through the woods as if possessed, and it turns out she had started acting that way after her father gave her a random stone. When she randomly takes off, Noobrious has to find her. She passes out and little fairy things escape from her stone.
Suddenly another girl disappears, Arcelia, who was apparently attacked by some tiger. Luckily, she’s fine, and the Tiger is actually protecting her. It turns out that a jealous Ingrid (the exorcist) attacked her and used a soul syphon to take her soul. Ingrid flees, but is saved by Nooborious. Embarrassed by her behaviour, Ingrid releases the soul and is quickly forgiven.
Days later, after a few more people disappear in the woods, Arcelia tells Nooborious that she believes that they should go to the summit of Mt. Kamihr to talk to a dragon there.
The dragon’s name is Sajj’aka, who explains that seals on the pass are beginning to awaken, and that “Hades” will return.
Our heroes try to get a new world tree sapling to plant in the labyrinth that holds Hades, and after some annoying quests with some dragon scales and the search for Leafallia, the tree is successfully planted.
After some more chaos in Adoulin, with a major leader who went missing now dead, the Rala Waterways are disrupted and the seal to King August’s grave was destroyed.
Unfortunately this guarantees two things. First, Hades will return. And Second, this fucking asshole Balamore (who seems like Hades right-hand-man) shows up like a more twisted Kefka, who you fight to get information about Hades from.
So the monsters have increased (FF1), noxious gasses are seeping out of the forests, and now our heroes must go to the depths of Adoulin to stop Hades.
Teodore, who came from Hades’s world challenges Noobriousious to a fight, looses, and reveals that Hades and him came from another world where Hades was able to use his lust for power to basically become a god, before being sealed in Adoulin.
After a fight with some crazy people popping in and out of different dimensions, our heroes defeat Hades, and Arcelia takes the throne of Adoulin.
Since seekers of Adoulin, FInal Fantasy XI began experiencing some serious nerfing, which was meant to get in new players for the game, and allowed it to compete more with casual MMORPGs such as World of Warcraft. Unfortunately, this had the unintended consequence of making people who were especially fond of the challenge aspect of 11 leave the game and complain to us about the changes to the game on Twitch.
For a few years, players thought that Seekers would be the final expansion, but a partial expansion, one that concludes the FF11 saga would soon come in the form of Rhapsodies of Vanadiel.